Where's yer bin?

About two weeks ago, I rang my local council rubbish department, as my bin, unlike those of my neighbours’, had not been emptied. Through metaphorical chewing gum, the girl I spoke to said the rounds had changed, and she was not permitted to pass on a message to the right people - it was against the ROOLS!!!! I’d have to ring back at 3 pm. Right in the middle of teaching - so that’s out of the window. If I wanted to complain, I’d have to write in, she added. So I spent a merry half hour being politely offensive filling in the on line complaints form for the rubbish department. Then I spotted a direct line form to Our Leader on the council. (Rereading the email below - Ask the Leader - obviously a party game.) So I copied my rude yet scrupulously civil message to the Leader, adding that I copied it to him because I gathered he would not be allowed to receive it via his organisation.


This was the email I received in response:


>From: "H*****d-C***k Stuart"
>To:
>CC: "Cllr K********y" >Subject: Complaint Refuse Service
>Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2006 12:00:36 +0100
>
>Dear Sir or Madam,
>
>Thank you for your recent communication via 'Ask the Leader' and the Complaints form.
>
>I am sorry that you have experienced a difficulty with our refuse collection service and that the matter was not resolved when you telephoned.
>
>Although we have an extremely high collection rate, occasionally a bin is missed and we have a procedure in place to deal with this. We ask residents to inform us by the end of the day following the scheduled collection so that we can return the next day to resolve a problem. Residents need to telephone 084*** *** *** (this number is published in our quarterly magazine and on the website).
>
>It seems that you did this. I can confirm that your area has not changed in the recent round changes. It is also the same crew that empties the Black bin so the crew know the area and would not have confused you with the community centre.
>
>Having made a mistake in missing your bin it was then compounded by the way your telephone call was handled. I will be taking this matter up with the supervisors of the teams concerned but in order to provide suitable guidance it would be helpful if you could confirm to me the telephone number you used, the name of the person you spoke to and any job reference number they may have given you.
>
>I appreciate that you may have excess waste when you present your black bin next Tuesday, the 25th April and I have asked the crew on this occasion to collect it.
>
>Thank you for drawing this matter to my attention.
>
>Yours faithfully,
>
>
>
>S. L. H*****d-C***k
>Environment Operations Manager


To this I replied:

Dear Sir or Madam

Thanks for your email - fortunately the bin WAS finally emptied.

But there are two things which need your urgent attention.

1) I was told the rounds had changed. If this is not so, please tell the department people concerned. Erroneous information is useless.

2) Please ensure that any so-called 'rules' about not being able to pass messages around the department concerned (and any others) is scrapped forthwith, should it actually exist, and the assertion that I would have to ring AGAIN is also scrapped. One call should be sufficient in a well-run and well-organised company.

I should, however, like to thank you for your kind reply.

Susy Worzencraft

A cheery message from Susy Worzencraft
PS: please don’t send LARGE attachments, as it blocks the drains



But there was another email, and by this time, I’m p*ssing myself:


>From: "H*****d-C***k Stuart" >
To:
>Subject: refuse collection 2nd email
>Date: Fri, 21 Apr 2006 12:13:49 +0100
>
>Further to my earlier email, I have confused myself. Next week is not black but Green again and we cannot take excess waste that may be in plastic.
>
>Please let me know if you have a difficulty and I will see what we can do
>
>Regards
>
>Stuart
>01*** ******



Irresistible!


Hi there Stuart - this is getting quite chummy!

Don't worry that I might confuse MYSELF rgarding the correct colour of bin to be put out - I always check what my neighbours have put out, so that at least we're all either wrong, or right.

Best wishes, Susy